humor??? for some
Printed From: Unofficial Allis
Category: Other Topics
Forum Name: Shops, Barns, Varmints, and Trucks
Forum Description: anything you want to talk about except politics
URL: https://www.allischalmers.com/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=166440
Printed Date: 26 Apr 2024 at 10:06am
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Topic: humor??? for some
Posted By: FloydKS
Subject: humor??? for some
Date Posted: 08 Dec 2019 at 6:56am
El Dorado, Kansas | An agricultural airplane pilot made a serious mistake this morning while operating his aircraft under the influence of alcohol, accidentally dumping his cargo of manure over cars, houses, and residents.According to the police report, 51-year old Barry Wood had a blood alcohol concentration (BAC) of 0.48% when he was arrested, six times the legal limit allowed to drive a motor vehicle and 12 times the legal limit allowed to operate a plane. He was supposed to spread 4 tons of liquid manure over fields belonging to his employer but his capacities were visibly too impaired. “So drunk that he had urinated on himself”He turned in the wrong direction, heading over the nearby city of El Dorado instead of the fields he was supposed to spray, before releasing his smelly cargo. Residents of the city were taken off guard as tons of liquid manure started raining over the city, causing several car accidents and totally ruining an outdoor wedding ceremony. Butler County Sheriff’s Office spokesman, Lt. John Fitzpatrick, says the emergency lines received over 900 calls in less than 5 minutes after the incident.
The deputies were rapidly able to identify the plane behind the incident and were waiting near the landing strip when Mr. Wood returned from his venture.
 Butler County Sheriff’s Office spokesman, Lt. John Fitzpatrick, says the accused was so drunk that he had urinated on himself and wasn’t able to stand up when the deputies arrested him only a minute or two after his landing. Mr. Wood will now face a total of 269 criminal charges, including performing an aviation function while over the prescribed alcohol limit, aggravated assault and criminal damage to property. If found guilty on all charges, he faces a total of 1235 years in prison and a fine of $2,335,500 and his pilot’s license could also be suspended by the FAA if he is found guilty of flying while under the influence of alcohol. His trial is scheduled to begin in January at the Butler County Courthouse. ------------- Holding a grudge is like taking poison and expecting the other person to die |
falling from the skies, fearing a biological
attack from Islamic terrorists or the Democrats.”Replies:
Posted By: fixer1958
Date Posted: 08 Dec 2019 at 7:16am
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Well he landed the plane OK....... |
Posted By: desertjoe
Date Posted: 08 Dec 2019 at 7:59am
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Posted By: desertjoe
Date Posted: 08 Dec 2019 at 8:01am
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UMMmmm,,if he is a dem,,,,errrrr,,,,never mind,,it's Sunday,,,,
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Posted By: JW in MO
Date Posted: 08 Dec 2019 at 8:18am
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Hey, that says Eldorado, Kansas, I think that should be Eldorado Springs, MO. We Missourians take our drunken pilots and crane operators seriously.  What do you want to bet instead of getting confused he said to himself, "Oh now this $%@t is going to be funny." ------------- Maximum use of available resources! |
Posted By: chaskaduo
Date Posted: 08 Dec 2019 at 8:42am
I agree JW, alcohol will do that for ya.  ------------- 1938 B, 79 Dynamark 11/36 6spd, 95 Weed-Eater 16hp, 2010 Bolens 14hp |
Posted By: Darrell G (MN)
Date Posted: 08 Dec 2019 at 11:59am
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I question whether this is real |
Posted By: steve(ill)
Date Posted: 08 Dec 2019 at 12:06pm
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I don't know if it is real........... but it is FUNNY ! “Everyone was freaking out, complaining about  falling from the skies, fearing a biological attack from Islamic terrorists or the Democrats.”------------- Like them all, but love the "B"s. |
Posted By: steve(ill)
Date Posted: 08 Dec 2019 at 12:07pm
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IF ???? If found guilty on all charges, he faces a total of 1235 years in prison and a fine of $2,335,500 and his pilot’s license could also be suspended by the FAA if he is found guilty of flying while under the influence of alcohol. ------------- Like them all, but love the "B"s. |
Posted By: JW in MO
Date Posted: 08 Dec 2019 at 12:08pm
Well of course it is, it was on FB! Annnnd there are pictures and everything. ------------- Maximum use of available resources! |
Darrell G (MN) wrote:Posted By: thendrix
Date Posted: 08 Dec 2019 at 12:32pm
------------- "Farming is a business that makes a Las Vegas craps table look like a regular paycheck" Ronald Reagan |
Posted By: weiner
Date Posted: 08 Dec 2019 at 1:15pm
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Mom always said just be thankful that cows can`t fly. ------------- Real heros wear dogtags, not capes. |
Posted By: LouSWPA
Date Posted: 08 Dec 2019 at 1:28pm
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It does have the smell and feel of a 'less than truthful' story. ------------- I am still confident of this; I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord. Ps 27 |
Posted By: Hubert (Ga)engine7
Date Posted: 08 Dec 2019 at 1:33pm
That wasn't  he was spraying, it was political promises! Darn good pilot if he could land that plane safely when he was so plastered he couldn't walk.------------- Just an old country boy saved by the grace of God. |
Posted By: TimCNY
Date Posted: 08 Dec 2019 at 4:46pm
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Well, 'tis the season of impeachment articles being drawn up, so --- Reminds me of Randy Quaid in "Independence Day." ------------- I need more than 200 characters for my "signature." I'd love to see that changed to 250! |
Posted By: DiyDave
Date Posted: 08 Dec 2019 at 6:34pm
We'll have to get tranny to check it on snopes!  ------------- Source: Babylon Bee. Sponsored by BRAWNDO, its got what you need! |
Posted By: shameless dude
Date Posted: 09 Dec 2019 at 11:09pm
| shucks...I would have done the same thing...sober! |
Posted By: JohnCO
Date Posted: 09 Dec 2019 at 11:15pm
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Good thing Dale can't fly! Looked it up, it was reported by World News Daily, which is a farce news outfit, like the Onion. They did have a real picture of manure being sprayed from spreaders onto cars somewhere in France, pretty impressive. Four tons of manure would need a pretty big plane to haul it, like a C130 or something. ------------- "If at first you don't succeed, get a bigger hammer" Allis Express participant |
Posted By: Greg (Hillsboro, OH)
Date Posted: 10 Dec 2019 at 11:29am
And I'm sure the mayor would have been none to happy at what he received!!!!
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Posted By: iowallis
Date Posted: 11 Dec 2019 at 7:06pm
Sounds like a scene out of the Andy Griffith show with Otis the drunk. Wonder if Aunt Bea is going to bring some fried chicken down to the jail for him? |