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Thad in AR. 
Orange Level Access
Joined: 12 Sep 2009
Location: Arkansas
Points: 9286
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 Topic: Now I done it
Posted: 26 Nov 2019 at 6:05am |
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Jenny wanted a real Christmas tree. Saturday we went to a Christmas tree farm. That place was full up with young moms and kids. They give you a cart and bow saw to go get your tree. I decided to put my arm in my shirt and tell kids to watch those bow saws. A father and his two kids walked by us and the little boy asked what happened to my arm? I told him the saw got me. There was also l little girl and she panicked. I apologize to them. The father told me his kids need more of that in their life and he was glad I did the stunt.
Jenn wasn’t so impressed.
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Ted J
Orange Level
Joined: 05 Jul 2010
Location: La Crosse, WI
Points: 18727
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Posted: 26 Nov 2019 at 8:48am |
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People just can't laugh at themselves or others anymore. What a GREAT loss for all the generations coming up.
Had a friend that used to take out his glass eye and put it on the bar. Then he said; "Got to keep an eye on my drink, I gotta pee". Lot of people wanted to puke.
SO, did ya get that tree? What kind and how tall?
You could always tell Jenn the story of how the Angel got on top of the tree......
HAPPY Thanksgiving buddy!
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"Allis-Express"
19?? WC / 1941 C / 1952 CA / 1956 WD45 / 1957 WD45 / 1958 D-17
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desertjoe
Orange Level Access
Joined: 23 Sep 2013
Location: New mexico
Points: 13361
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Posted: 26 Nov 2019 at 9:36am |
Yeah, Thad,,you prolly gave them kids something to worry bout,,,,they be watchin Daddy pretty close while he's cuttin their tree,.,,  The Wife was always wanting the Biggest, Prettiest Fraiser Fir we could find,,,and,,,and,,that was AFTER we had looked at the trees at several stores,,,fact is,,one time we drove over the mountain to Alamogordo to find "THE Tree",,,then she would take 2-3 dyas to decorate it just so, so,,,,! These days I take the artificial Fraiser Fir from the rafters in the garage, put it together and me and the Grandson decorate it pretty good,,, I kinda like ole John(Mi) I think it was,,,idea of leavin the tree decorated and just put it down in the basement and just bring it up all ready to go,,,,'Cept I ain't gots a basement,,,,
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Stan IL&TN
Orange Level
Joined: 13 Sep 2009
Location: Elvis Land
Points: 6730
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Posted: 26 Nov 2019 at 12:29pm |
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My next door neighbor had throat cancer and they removed his voice box. He used one of those throat vibrators against the side of his neck to speak. One day he was checking out at a store that he frequented and the girl at the register asked what had happened?
He pulled out the vibratory and placed it against his neck and said, "Wife.............cut throat". 😆
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1957 WD45 dad's first AC
1968 one-seventy
1956 F40 Ferguson
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chaskaduo
Orange Level
Joined: 26 Nov 2016
Location: Twin Cities
Points: 5203
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Posted: 26 Nov 2019 at 3:07pm |
She could a pulled a Lorena Bobbit move instead. 
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1938 B, 79 Dynamark 11/36 6spd, 95 Weed-Eater 16hp, 2010 Bolens 14hp
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desertjoe
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Joined: 23 Sep 2013
Location: New mexico
Points: 13361
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Posted: 26 Nov 2019 at 5:33pm |
DANG,,,but is that a BIG pig sticker or what,,,,???
And that idiot still standing there,,,,,if thet witch done that to me,,,,,that pig sticker would find it's way to her valentine,,,,oooooohhh that hurts just lookin at it,,,,,
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Bob D. (La)
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Joined: 12 Sep 2009
Location: Louisiana
Points: 25529
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Posted: 26 Nov 2019 at 6:13pm |
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She is from Cutoff, La. and he is from Dry Prong, La.
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When you find yourself in a hole,PUT DOWN THE SHOVEL!!!
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desertjoe
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Joined: 23 Sep 2013
Location: New mexico
Points: 13361
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Posted: 27 Nov 2019 at 1:46am |
 Bob D. (La) wrote:
She is from Cutoff, La. and he is from Dry Prong, La. |
Good one ,,Bob,,,
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