Pay back

You and Jennifer are good people, many just off load this family care, when a little more effort on their part is all that is required. Yes it can be trying at times to, but I think of all the bull$#*t  I've pulled, and the rescues my MOM has put up with and done for me. I have MOM here at home with me, if I didn't, I don't think I would still have her (she is 85). There my come a time when they truly need more then we can give, then it is the right thing. They will still need regular, and not just holiday visits and love, even if they can't remember you, they still feel loved. Kudos to all who ease the burdens of their elders in their twilight years.

My mother lived by herself for a lot of years then decided she wanted to go into a assisted living and that was the best thing that she could have done. They make her take her pills on time and eat 3 meals a day plus a snack, she doing better in there than she was by herself she is 94

Had mother in law live with us for 3 years - kind of a trial but for wife then least she did not have to drive over every day to check on her mom. Problem came wife was having health problems and as soon as she seemed to get better her mom would end up in hospital for something . kind of steady trips somewhere for health problems . 

We managed to keep Grandma on Mom's side in her own home until 98, she nearly set fire to her kitchen the THIRD try so we said time to stop pretending. She was mad at first then separation anxious over leaving the security of her house but then calmed down and survived until 101. MIL was in her own home off and on between bouts with health issues and halfway rehab facilities she passed just into her eighties. My own Mom died early 63, her Dad died at 60 and my own Brother died same circumstances at 44, I feel blessed to have passed all three of their ages.

Dad checked himself into a Assisted living center at 74, could not manage his own home and barely could drive, I got his car away from him at 79, he passed at 82. FIL passed in his own bed at 73 from COPD complications, home cared by my wife, sorry to say she saw the worst of the disease progression. My Dad's dad, my Grandfather died at 71, Lung Cancer in St Mary's at Jeff City MO, our Dad would NOT let us visit G'pa in his last month, did not want him remembered that way. Grandma on that side lived in her own apartment until 84, developed a severe angina attack was in the E-room of a hospital where the aneurism burst flooding her chest she fell asleep and passed calmly.

My wife took care of her Dad in his home for most of 4 years, after his short term memory left for good. He gradually got worse over time, and even with hiring other help a couple days a week, it took a toll on her. When he could no longer walk with a walker on his own, the wife decided to move him to a care facility early this year. He seems to be doing OK now and has good care, without the wear and tear on the wife.
 i don't know if he remembers his family, but seems to acknowledge their presence.

We went up to the farm last weekend to see the MIL. She is 90 and still lives alone on the farm plus cuts her own grass. She was complaining that some of the TV channels had changed or didn't work any longer. While we were talking I picked up the remote and rescanned the channels and got all her favorite channels back. I'm the favorite SIL again. Said it was the best present ever. 😊😊😊😊

I do feel her memory is slipping some along with her driving skills. It may be time in the near future to evaluate her independence.

Yep, PRICELESS,,,,,,,,,,,Mothers.  Mine has been in a home now for a year and a half.  My older sister and her hubby and I go play dominoes with Mom at least twice a week.  It's payback for all the years of her taking care of me.

Thad, you're a good son and the times ahead will get a little rougher, but you can do it.  Just think of the love....