Secret Mission - don't tell anyone
Printed From: Unofficial Allis
Category: Other Topics
Forum Name: Shops, Barns, Varmints, and Trucks
Forum Description: anything you want to talk about except politics
URL: https://www.allischalmers.com/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=173892
Printed Date: 08 Sep 2025 at 7:47am
Software Version: Web Wiz Forums 11.10 - http://www.webwizforums.com
Topic: Secret Mission - don't tell anyone
Posted By: Coke-in-MN
Subject: Secret Mission - don't tell anyone
Date Posted: 28 Aug 2020 at 12:00am
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THE WAR OF 1812 AT WAL-MART Yesterday, I wore my Vietnam Veteran cap to Wal-Mart. There was nothing in particular that I needed at the world's largest retailer; but, since I retired, trips to "Wally World" to look at the Walmartians is always good for some comic relief. Besides, I always feel pretty normal after seeing some of the people that frequent the establishment. But, I digress, enough of my psychological fixations. While standing in line to check out, the guy in front of me, probably in his early thirties, asked, "Are you a Viet Nam Vet?” "No," I replied. "Then why are you wearing that cap?” "Because I couldn't find the one from the War of 1812 . . ” I thought it was a snappy retort. "The War of 1812, huh?" the Walmartian queried, "When was that?” God forgive me, but I couldn't pass up such an opportunity. "1946", I answered, as straight-faced as possible. He pondered my response for a moment and responded, "Why do they call it the War of 1812 if it was in 1946?” "It was a Black Op Mission. No one is supposed to know about it. ” This was beginning to become fun! "Dude! Really?" He exclaimed. "How did you get to do something that COOOOL?” I glanced furtively around me for effect, leaned toward the guy and in a low voice said, "I'm not sure. I was the only Caucasian on the mission.” "Dude," he was really getting excited about what he was hearing, "that is seriously awesome! But, didn't you kind of stand out?” "Not really. The other guys were wearing white camouflage.” The moron nodded knowingly. "Listen man," I said in a very serious tone, "You can't tell anyone about this. It's still classified 'Top Secret' and I shouldn't have said anything.” "Oh yeah?" he gave me the 'don't threaten me look. . "Like, what's gonna’ happen if I do?” With a really hard look I said, "You have a family don't you? We wouldn't want anything to happen to them, would we?” The guy gulped, left his basket where it was and fled through the door. The lady behind me started laughing so hard I thought she was about to have a heart attack. I just grinned at her. After checking out and going to the parking lot, I saw dimwit leaning in a car window talking to a young woman. Upon catching sight of me, he started pointing excitedly in my direction. Giving him another 'deadly' serious look, I made the 'I see you' gesture. He turned kind of pale, jumped in the car and sped out of the parking lot. And these people VOTE! What a great time! Tomorrow I'm going back, wearing my Homeland Security cap. Then the next day I will go to the driver's license bureau wearing my Border Patrol hat, and see how long it takes to empty the place. Whoever said retirement is boring? You just need to wear the right kind of cap! ------------- Life lesson: If you’re being chased by a lion, you’re on a horse, to the left of you is a giraffe and on the right is a unicorn, what do you do? You stop drinking and get off the carousel. |
Replies:
Posted By: Hubert (Ga)engine7
Date Posted: 28 Aug 2020 at 6:37am
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Coke, That is a good one! LMAO! Sadly there are people out there that are that stupid and even worse they vote. ------------- Just an old country boy saved by the grace of God. |
Posted By: DMiller
Date Posted: 28 Aug 2020 at 6:46am
| Now that is so FUNNY in a sad sort of way!!! |
Posted By: chaskaduo
Date Posted: 28 Aug 2020 at 9:16am
Not only vote but breed, and that ain't funny.  ------------- 1938 B, 79 Dynamark 11/36 6spd, 95 Weed-Eater 16hp, 2010 Bolens 14hp |
Posted By: Ray54
Date Posted: 28 Aug 2020 at 11:27am
Some even attempt to look normal by posting things on here. Thank you Coke. The older I get the more fun such things are.
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Posted By: Boss Man
Date Posted: 28 Aug 2020 at 12:07pm
| Its funny but sad. Fun to mess with people though |
Posted By: shameless dude
Date Posted: 29 Aug 2020 at 12:18am
| good job buddy! you did good! they are here, nuthin we can do about it other than have fun with them! |
Posted By: Brian S(NY)
Date Posted: 29 Aug 2020 at 4:28pm
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:) ------------- God made man.Sam colt made man equal. |
Posted By: steve(ill)
Date Posted: 29 Aug 2020 at 7:38pm
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YEP........... that is funny ! ------------- Like them all, but love the "B"s. |
Posted By: JoeO(CMO)
Date Posted: 29 Aug 2020 at 11:02pm
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you are having too much fun in retirement! ------------- |
Posted By: Ted J
Date Posted: 31 Aug 2020 at 9:27pm
Coke, you're giving me ideas!! ------------- "Allis-Express" 19?? WC / 1941 C / 1952 CA / 1956 WD45 / 1957 WD45 / 1958 D-17 |
Posted By: shameless dude
Date Posted: 04 Sep 2020 at 1:31am
| i used to have a red light bar on top of one of my personel vehicles...some days we'd grab a beer, and go driving in the country. if you looked down the way a bit you'd see all kinds of bean walkers, but when you get even with the fields, you wouldn't see a single one! lol |
Posted By: Ray54
Date Posted: 04 Sep 2020 at 10:37am
Did not happen to be a light lime green color too? |
shameless dude wrote:Posted By: chaskaduo
Date Posted: 04 Sep 2020 at 11:01am
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Jumping Beans??? ------------- 1938 B, 79 Dynamark 11/36 6spd, 95 Weed-Eater 16hp, 2010 Bolens 14hp |